


Eyes as Red as Blood

by CrazyAssFangirl



Category: My Hero Academia
Genre: Here's some depressing stuff for you., M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-06-29 22:26:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15738564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyAssFangirl/pseuds/CrazyAssFangirl
Summary: Izuku would do anything to protect the one he loves, so when he does, it leaves the person in question shattered and lost. And what do you do when you've lost the thing that make you who you are? Once something has shattered, there's no way to put it back together again, and once something is lost, there's no way to get it back.





	1. Chapter 1

I didn't regret pushing Kacchan out of the way. After all, what use is regretting pushing the one you love out of danger? I knew the stab wound was deep, and that I probably wouldn't live long enough for anyone to do much of anything, but I was okay with dying this way. After all, I'd achieved my two life goals: making up with Kacchan, and becoming a hero. My vision became tinted with dots of black as an overwhelming urge to sleep came over me. That, mixed with the numb feeling that was sweeping through my body made it easy to forget that I was bleeding out on an abandoned city street.

"DEKU, YOU MAJOR IDIOT!" I heard Kacchan yell loudly, but I just smiled as he grabbed one of my hands with both of his shaking hands, his strong fingers squeezing my numb hands. "WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THIS? IF YOU THINK I'M JUST GONNA SIT HERE AND LET YOU DIE, THEN YOU HAVE ANOTHER THINg FUCKING COMING, YOU DAMN DEKU!" I looked into his eyes, and saw, to my mild suprise, that he was crying. Only a couple of tears fell from his eyes, but more welled up. I smiled at him.

"Hey Kacchan, I haven't seen you cry in a while." His eyes widened, as if the tears hadn't even registered in his mind. "I'm okay with this though, Kacchan. I'm okay with dying to protect someone. So no need to cry, alright?" I coughed violently, pain washing through my body like a wave of burning fire and numbing ice at once. Kacchan then went started moving, applying pressure to the stab wound I had in my gut. The blackness at the edges of my vision was growing larger, and the urge to sleep was almost irresistable.

"No! Fuck you, Deku! Where do you get off dying so damn soon, ya shitty little nerd?!" He glared at me, more tears falling down his cheeks, and slowly, I raised a shaky hand and gently brushed away some of the tears with my thumb. I thought I heard a whimper come from him, before his lips crashed down onto mine. If I hadn't been bleeding out in the street, I would've done more than try to bring myself up to reciprocate. I couldn't though, because pain washed through me again, and I gritted my teeth so I wouldn't scream. Kacchan pulled away, his blood red eyes being the last thing I saw before my eyes slid closed, my body too weak to keep them open.

"I....Love y-ou, Kac-chan." I managed to choke out, before I fell into the blackness.

　

Kacchan's P.o.V:

My only thought as Deku's eyes slid closed was 'NO!' Deku couldn't die. He was the thing that brought happiness to so many people's lives. I felt for a pulse, and I started to panic a bit, before finding a weak, unsteady pulse. I finally decided 'fuck it. I want to cry.' So I let myself let go of everything that told me that crying was showing weakness, that it was basically a form of giving up.

Earlier, when it'd turned out that the quirkless bastard we were fighting was too good with a sword, we'd called for reinforcements. A small part of me hoped to God that Recovery Girl would come as well, but I knew it was unlikely. Still applying pressure to Deku's wounds, my eye sight blurry with tears, I prayed for the second time in my whole God damned life.

I don't know how long I sat there, hoping for anyone to come along and help us, but eventually I heard the familiar voice of Kirishima yelling out Deku and I's names excitedly. He was what I would consider to be my best friend. He skidded to a stop when he saw that the lump on the ground was Deku, though, his expression one of horror. I couldn't blame him. At some point, my tears had dried up, so I could see that blood covered his uniform, his face, he even had blood in his green hair. There was also blood on the ground that came after he initally received the wound.

Then I blinked, and I was in the back of a van, holding Deku's hand. I blinked again, and I was robotically walking down the hallway of U.A that led to the infirmary. When I blinked for a third time, I was sitting in a chair next to the bed Deku lay on. There was hushed conversation in the background, but I was too busy listening to the heart moniter, the steady beeping helping me relax slightly. Someone had cleaned up Deku, but he still looked pale, small, weak, and like _death_. A sob ripped from my mouth as I remembered the stab wound I would've received on the right side of my chest, if Deku hadn't pushed me out of the way. When I'd kissed him, it'd been on instinct, but he had weakly managed to kiss me back, before collapsing to the ground again as the pain became too much for his body to handle. I'd realized long ago that Deku was what I needed in order to be complete, but I could never figure out how to tell him.

Then, the worst sound in the world reached my ears: the flatlining of the heart moniter. I froze as Recovery Girl raced towards Deku to try to save him, but I knew that nothing would save him. Nothing would be capable of bringing back Deku. So, I cried.

Deku was buried on U.A grounds a week later, near where Aizawa sensei had tested up on the first day. Everyone that attended had tears streaming down their cheeks, but none of them looked like they were lost, not even his mom. None of them looked like they'd just had everything that made them _themselves_ ripped away. None of them quite looked like I felt, and as I looked at the sky, I vaguely wondered if Deku was finally happy.

 


	2. Alternate Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An alternate ending, just in case you wanted a happy ending. I don't even know what the fuck this alternate ending is, but I hope you enjoy. I still can't write smut for shit, but it was heavily implied. Like, as subtle as a herd of lions eating salads and talking about the weather, kind of subtle.

I didn't regret pushing Kacchan out of the way. After all, what use is regretting pushing the one you love out of danger? I knew the stab wound was deep, and that I probably wouldn't live long enough for anyone to do much of anything, but I was okay with dying this way. After all, I'd achieved my two life goals: making up with Kacchan, and becoming a hero. My vision became tinted with dots of black as an overwhelming urge to sleep came over me. That, mixed with the numb feeling that was sweeping through my body made it easy to forget that I was bleeding out on an abandoned city street.

" **DEKU, YOU MAJOR IDIOT!** " I heard Kacchan yell loudly, but I just smiled as he grabbed one of my hands with both of his shaking hands, his strong fingers squeezing my numb hands. " **WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THIS? IF YOU THINK I'M JUST GONNA SIT HERE AND LET YOU DIE, THEN YOU HAVE ANOTHER THING FUCKING COMING, YOU DAMN DEKU!** " I looked into his eyes, and saw, to my mild surprise, that he was crying. Only a couple of tears fell from his eyes, but more welled up. I smiled at him.

"Hey Kacchan, I haven't seen you cry in a while." His eyes widened, as if the tears hadn't even registered in his mind. "I'm okay with this though, Kacchan. I'm okay with dying to protect someone. So no need to cry, alright?" I coughed violently, pain washing through my body like a wave of burning fire and numbing ice at once. Kacchan then went started moving, applying pressure to the stab wound I had in my gut. The blackness at the edges of my vision was growing larger, and the urge to sleep was almost irresistible.

"No! Fuck you, Deku! Where do you get off dying so damn soon, ya shitty little nerd?!" He glared at me, more tears falling down his cheeks, and slowly, I raised a shaky hand and gently brushed away some of the tears with my thumb. I thought I heard a whimper come from him, before his lips crashed down onto mine. If I hadn't been bleeding out in the street, I would've done more than try to bring myself up to reciprocate. I couldn't though, because pain washed through me again, and I gritted my teeth so I wouldn't scream. Kacchan pulled away, his blood red eyes being the last thing I saw before my eyes slid closed, my body too weak to keep them open.

"I....Love y-ou, Kac-chan." I managed to choke out, before I fell into the blackness.

　

**Kacchan's P.o.V:**

My only thought as Deku's eyes slid closed was 'NO!' Deku couldn't die. He was the thing that brought happiness to so many people's lives. I felt for a pulse, and I started to panic a bit, before finding a weak, unsteady pulse. I finally decided 'fuck it. I want to cry.' So I let myself let go of everything that told me that crying was showing weakness, that it was basically a form of giving up.

Earlier, when it'd turned out that the quirkless bastard we were fighting was too good with a sword, we'd called for reinforcements. A small part of me hoped to God that Recovery Girl would come as well, but I knew it was unlikely. Still applying pressure to Deku's wounds, my eye sight blurry with tears, I prayed for the second time in my whole God damned life.

I don't know how long I sat there, hoping for anyone to come along and help us, but eventually I heard the familiar voice of Kirishima yelling out Deku and I's names excitedly. He was what I would consider to be my best friend. He skidded to a stop when he saw that the lump on the ground was Deku, though, his expression one of horror. I couldn't blame him. At some point, my tears had dried up, so I could see that blood covered his uniform, his face, he even had blood in his green hair. There was also blood on the ground that came after he initially received the wound.

Then I blinked, and I was in the back of a van, holding Deku's hand. I blinked again, and I was robotically walking down the hallway of U.A that led to the infirmary. When I blinked for a third time, I was sitting in a chair next to the bed Deku lay on. There was hushed conversation in the background, but I was too busy listening to the heart monitor, the steady beeping helping me relax slightly. Someone had cleaned up Deku, but he still looked pale, small, weak, and like _death_. A sob ripped from my mouth as I remembered the stab wound I would've received on the right side of my chest, if Deku hadn't pushed me out of the way. When I'd kissed him, it'd been on instinct, but he had weakly managed to kiss me back, before collapsing to the ground again as the pain became too much for his body to handle. I'd realized long ago that Deku was what I needed in order to be complete, but I could never figure out how to tell him.

Then, the worst sound in the world reached my ears: the flat lining of the heart moniker. I froze as Recovery Girl raced towards Deku to try to save him, and I felt myself muttering a quiet prayer to any god that may or may not exist that Deku would come back. It took longer than I'd hoped, but eventually his heartbeat was steady, if not a bit weak. Deku's hand, which I still hadn't let go of, twitched slightly, and I squeezed it weakly with my heavily shaking hands. He stayed asleep, not that I expected any different, and I still refused to leave his side.

By the time three weeks had passed, Deku was still snoozing the day away, but Recovery Girl said that he'd wake up eventually. I was starting to get pissed. One day, after another person asked how I was doing, instead of paying attention to Deku, who had a fucking scar from a _stab wound,_ I lost my shit. "DAMMIT!" I yelled at Deku, grabbing his shoulders and glaring at him. "YOU BETTER WAKE THE _FUCK_ UP, SHITTY DEKU!" His heartbeat spiked suddenly, as if he had heard me. "Oh, so you _can_ fucking hear us. Listen closely then, shitty Deku: WE'RE ALL FUCKING WORRIED ABOUT YOU, SO HOW ABOUT YOU USE THAT GIANT ASS NERD BRAIN OF YOURS TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO WAKE THE FUCK UP, SO WE CAN GET ON WITH OUR LIVES! You've missed three weeks of class, and everyone's so fucking scared that you're gonna kick the bucket that nobody can talk about anything else! I walked in on Aizawa sensei making out will Present Mic with tears streaming down his cheeks! All Might sensei hasn't bothered to change into his hero form at all these past few weeks, Midnight sensei wore a turtleneck sweater and _jeans_ to teach our class, and everyone's so depressed that the dorms smells horrible! Round face has cried so much lately, I'm pretty sure her eyes are permanently red! So how about waking the fuck up and letting us go back to normal! This situation has us so fucked up that Kirishima and Kaminari haven't done anything stupid, useless, or other wise fucking ridiculous since before we left to get that villain! I've cried so much lately that I put four year old you to shame, so wake up and help cheer us up. I can't stand not seeing that stupid smile making the rest of our god damn class even happier than normal. I can't stand having Iida so out of it that he hasn't bugged me about blowing shit up. Even Mineta is fucking sad! I haven't seen him harass a girl in days. Please, De- Izuku. Please just wake up." I was watching his crooked hand as I poured out word vomit, which was usually his thing. "Please, for holy hell Izuku, just wake up. Aunty's lost her smile and nobody knows how to bring it back. She looks so miserable when she walks in and you're still sleeping. We all miss you. Hell, I miss you Izuku. I miss you like hell and if you think you can stay asleep just to avoid talking or dealing with the amount of shit we have to deal with." I looked around and saw we were alone. "Izuku, I love you. I love you so much it hurts, sometimes. I'm sorry I was shitty to you when we were younger, but I hated how you made me feel, how I didn't even know what you made me feel. I kissed you because I was so damn scared that I was going to lose you, so I didn't want you to die thinking I didn't care, because I _do care._ I care about you a hell of a lot more than should be possible. Before when we first came to the U.A, I thought I was okay with pretending like you annoyed the hell out me, I thought I'd be okay with watching over you silently while you grew up and married Round face or Half n' half, but I'm _not_. It hurt seeing you get stabbed, it hurt seeing that you were okay with dying, and it hurt that you would protect me so selflessly even though I was nothing but an ass hole to you." My chest hurt from the sobs I kept locked up, the only physical signs of my sadness and regret being the slight shaking of my body and the silent tears that dripped their way down my cheeks and onto the pristine white sheets Deku lay on. "Every time I hurt you or saw you get hurt, it tears me apart a little more each time. I love how you're completely selfless, but it hurts to see you smiling when you're so obviously in pain. It also pisses me off that people take advantage of that selflessness. It pisses me off so much that I don't know what to do with all the anger, so I just..... Explode. Please, please, for the love of god, just wake up! I can't stand it anymore. I almost never leave your side because I keep hoping you'll wake up, and each day that passes where you don't wake up is another day filled with false hopes, stupid wishes, anxiety, and an endless dull ache that only you can help." Then, I started sobbing, not caring about the world around me, not caring that the walls weren't sound proof and that many people probably heard me just spill my guts then start to sob.

"K-Kacchan." A quiet, scratchy voice said, and my head jerked up to lock eyes with the forest green pair that I'd missed so much. He tried to smile, but then winced and started to cough roughly. I pulled a water bottle I'd put on the floor by his bed a few days ago. I carefully poured some into his mouth, watching his expression so that I knew when to stop pouring. I had to help him swallow, but his voice sounded clearer than before when he spoke again. "I'm sorry I worried you so much, Kac- Katsuki." He gave me a tired grin, and I felt my face explode with heat. He chuckled, but then I leaned over his body, glaring into his eyes, my lips inches from his.

"If you scare us again like that, shitty Deku, even god won't be able to save your ass. Got it?" I felt tears gather in my eyes again as I crashed our lips together, softer than the first time, but still roughly. He kissed back, and while it was totally sloppy and desperate, I didn't care. Nothing could've made me care about anything else in the world except for Deku right at that moment. Not even if the apocalypse started, not even if All Might said I was the new number 1 hero, not even if Endeavor died by his fire quirk. I had climbed onto the bed, laying down directly over Deku, using my forearms to support the majority of my weight. Deku whimpered into the now open mouthed kiss, and I smirked. That is, before Deku flipped our positions with a strength he shouldn't have right after waking up from a god damn _coma_ , but the strength just turned me on even more.

The next morning, Deku limped into the classroom, that bright ass shitty smile on his face as he apologized for worrying the extras, and I smirked as he shot me a special glare. Things were normal again, and Deku was mine and no one else's. That much was obvious from the dozens of hickeys he had littering his collarbone, chest, and shoulders.


End file.
